scottobear: (Default)
One year ago tonight, I was sharing thoughts with my beloved of the painted desert... These days, I have a split desire. one side of me wishes to keep her with me, all to myself, and just orbit off into bliss with her. The other half wants to take her around with my hippie buddies, especially Cathi, Dave and Leisa, where we can just goof around and have a big group good time. I want to carve a gourd with all my sweetie and other pals... I don't know if I'm going to have a pumpkin head on my stoop this year or not. If this cold keeps up, I may just blow off trick or treating again this year.

This coming Sunday, I have to take my bro to Mom's for her birthday (it's actually on Nov 1). Got her a nice hibiscus plant, and a gushy card... but I really don't want to spend much time there. I can be nice and diplomatic for a bit, but I would just as soon keep it to 3 hours or less.

Remembering my first spook house as a little boy... I was probably five or six, and we went to one held at a hospital (I think was... I was little, remember).

I wasn't afraid of the bloody doctor, or the witch with the cauldron... but a guy in a Spiderman costume grabbed my little brother, and ran off with him... I *freaked*. I went after him, and punched him as hard as my little kid-fists would let me. (not too hard, I guess.) My mother and grandma pried me off of him, but I would have no more of that place... I was pissed, and afraid. Later, I got mad because someone used Spidey's costume in vain! (Still like ol' Peter Parker, after all these years.)

I think that's my first memory of an adrenaline rush.
scottobear: (Default)
"Come out... come out... where-ever you are. To meet the young la-ady who fell from a star" Glenda was such a cool witch. Seemed like she was out of it the whole time, but then again, she did ride around in a bubble.

Dave might be giving me his old Mac this weekend... which would be very cool for doing development even more cross-platform. Now, I'm thinking about what the Network name on the Hive might be. (Current Network elements are Queen (big Brain), Worker (Lappie), and Drone (Palm).) So far, Pupa was offered, and I like that... but I figure I have until it gets strapped into the network (oh boy! AppleTalk! I haven't dealt with that in about 2 years...we'll see how hard or easy it is to add it to the hive at all. I'd like to share the dsl net connection and files) . I'm excited... I had a line on a free mac before, but the bottom fell out of that deal. This machine is the last one before the IMAC candy-colored ones came out... it's beige. :)

You know, one day, I'll have a lovely library in my home, with overstuffed chairs, wireless net connections, tasty scents of sandalwood and such, high bookcases reaching to the ceiling, and plenty of well read, loved books on the shelves. Meanwhile, I'll have to be happy with boxes in my closet. Maybe this weekend I'll get some shelves, and make more of my texts simpler to access.

Lost Souls

Oct. 21st, 2000 10:21 pm
scottobear: (Default)
Against the voting public, I went to see lost souls, on the logic that the others will be around longer, and therefore more accessible in the future. I'm glad that we went... it was quite well done, frightening, and well done. Lots of twists and turns, a few plot holes, but a nice scary ride. Also Picked up pumpkins for next weekend's gourd-carving... now I have a week to decide what sort of face/design to put on Ol' Jack.

Robb's is a very cool shape, sort of a "muppet Bert" slightly tapered cone, with a neat haircut-swirly stem on top. Mine's a more classic rusty-orange, and round. I opted out of picking up two...Also went to best buy, and decided against buying crimson skies or the AOE2 update... I'm doing ok in the games department.... besides, it gives folks stuff to get me for Xmas and B-day. :)

Got to shop for the rest of my costume tomorrow, but aside from that, the day is free...
scottobear: (Default)
Friday. Payday. Little Bro can't get to get her this weekend, and C&D are going to Dizzy World for Cathi's Birfday. Robb got his part of his project done, so maybe he and I can do something this weekend.. Upon reflection, Dave & Busters was quite fun, and not nearly as expensive as I'd assumed. Silly writing folder is still wacky, but it should be better by Sunday.

I want one of these psychotic hand-puppets! (see pic, if today is 10/20/00)

MMmmMM... also have to make some banana bread. yummy.

Getting Cathi a fountain, I think for her b'day.... not sure what sort yet, but the weekend will hook me up.
scottobear: (Man with a gun lives here)
http://dailynews.philly.com/content/daily_news/2000/10/10/local/VETT10.htm

Illegal here in Florida, the distribution of N2O is controlled... not like we couldn't get it...

That stuff is like hippie crack. I've done it once or twice, but do not plan on doing it again. I mean, if Hunter S. Thompson says it's bad... well. Damn. My big fear is that it cuts of oxygen to the brain. thats what makes it work. Uh... no more for me thanks... I'm glad that that stuff is a part of my past. A fine source of short-term hallucination and tunnel-vision... but that was my only real experience. some mild geometrics and flashing light.

Anyway, good morning!
scottobear: (Default)
The Magick of Language
We never experience "thoughts," "feelings," "perceptions," "intuitions," "sensations," "body symptoms." etc. We invent those categories after the fact. What we experience, nanosecond by nanosecond, consists of continuous reactions of the organism-as-whole to the environment-as-a-whole, including incoming verbal signals from others in the same predicament. These incoming verbal signals also produce in us reactions of the organism-as-a-whole sometimes culminating in a return signal.

That much seems simple neurobiological savvy.

But suppose I point a shamanic death-bone at you and recite a curse? Or utter a Magick Word that alarms and threatens you as much as a simple "fuck" threatens simple Methodists? We never "know" organismically all that we know theoretically. Parts of us remain simian, childish, inertial, mechanical etc.

Illustration: Consciously and will-fully remind yourself that you can tell the difference between a "movie" and "real life." Then go to see the latest ketchup-splattered horror/slasher classic and pay attention to how many times the director magically tricks you into real gasps, internal or overt cringe-reflexes, , dry mouth, clutching [seat-rails, coke can, companion's arm etc.] or other symptoms of minor but real [polygraph-diagnosable] anxiety and short-term near-panic, sometimes verging on vomit-reflex.

Illustration #2: With the same conscious and will-full reminders about the difference between "movies" and "real life," attend a hard-core XXX porno flick. Observe how long it takes before physiological responses indicate that parts of you at least have lost track of that distinction.

None of this represents trivial cases only. The role of magick in all language transactions has very concrete and exhilarating/terrifying implications; viz.

Well-documented case of a man literally killed by a shaman's curse and a "death-bone" -- The Psychobiology of Mind-Body Healing, by Ernest Lawrence Rossi, Norton, 1988, page 9-12.

Equally well-documented case of another man, a cancer patient, "miraculously" blessed by remission and recovery due to a placebo [with tumors shrunk to half their previous size], then cursed back into critical condition when learning of deaths of others receiving the same placebo -- same book, page 3-8.

Whoever speaks a sentence to another human may pronounce a blessing or a curse without even intending this.

Remember this the next time you get angry.
scottobear: (Default)
Last night at the Salty dog... it was interesting, if rather uneventful. Did something unusual, I drank a large quantity of beer. About 9. Had a conversation with a couple of folks who appeared intelligent, until they demanded to talk politics. feh. I opt out of that one, and play some pool with the only other neutral party in that debate, a guy named Mike. Nice fellow, a better pool player than I am. Apparently he has a band that plays at the pier on Tuesday nights (right across the street) so, I may go and see what the band is about... he says mostly cover stuff, but a couple of original bits.

Got a few lovely invites over the past week. Cathi & Dave want me, little Bro, and Robb to come over for the 5th annual gourd-slaughter and knifing in a few weeks. I never seem to make it to that, for some reason... hopefully, with 2 buddies reminding me about it, it'll be doable this time around.

I missed seeing Cider out and about online this weekend. :( I hope she'll poke a nose in soon.
scottobear: (Default)
Something I'm considering for my icon.... perhaps just for halloween.



I hooked up with my little bro, Cathi & Dave to go see Nurse Betty today. I wasn't too crazy about it, somehow I was expecting a "Madcap comedic romp through the wacky misadventures of a waitress" or some such stuff. It was a good movie, but not a flavor I was expecting.

dangit.

Sep. 10th, 2000 01:54 pm
scottobear: (Default)
No everway.

No movie with Dave.

Looks like I'll have time to pick up my groceries today after all.

Dang. Empty day. S'ok, though....I got a more than reasonable share of funtime yesterday.
scottobear: (Default)
Ugh. rough for me to shake off the snoozies today...

good comfy sleep last night. I didn't want to get out of bed, but I figure sleeping in to 10 am is late enough....

I called up regarding everway, and no info as to if we're getting together after all, maybe I'll go see Nurse Betty with Dave later on today.

I am Jack's need to be around other people.

Thank goodness newt is such a buddy... but, his verbal skills are lacking. I have a real need to talk/ discuss/ debate/ banter about some sorts of stuff.

fiddle-dee-dee.
scottobear: (Default)
::chortle::

A delightful day was had, indeed.

Got up at about 6am, showered and took a trip up coast about an hour to Jupiter (Juno Beach) where the swells were breaking at about chest to head level with Dave, Cathi, Derek and Luna the dog. (Juno is a dog beach, so it was cool) As the swells were so high, it was a little too rough for me to do any real surfing, but Dave and Derek did quite well, riding for a good 40-60 yards out there at times, cutting back and forth up to the pier. Cathi did a lot of boogie boarding, but the tide got to her, and she came back and rested after a very brief stay out there. I, on the other hand, remained on the shore, tossing the tennis ball and walking up and down the beach with Luna. Lots of really neat people out there, other dog walkers, girlfriends of the surfers out in the water, folks out getting tans. On the boardwalk area leading to the parking lot, I met a lovely family from Australia, and we talked about how spiffy each other's accents were. The one guy did a good impersonation of a New Zealander, and a New Jersey brogue too. They laughed at my Paul Hogan 'Guh-day Mite' bit, and were very prod of the whole Olympic thing coming up. I got some color, especially on my legs, which rarely see daylight. It was kind of sharky out, some blacktips, saw one about 6 feet, so that was the end of that. End of beach day, about 2pm, finished with peanut butter & honey sammiches and watermelon chunks. So good. We drove home, and I took a nap for about an hour. What is it about a day in the sun that wears me out? The Nap was solid, and Newton nestled comfortably along my right side, head resting on my shoulder. I wish I'd had the cam on to capture him... so cute. I got up about an hour later, and gave Robby a ring,to see if he wanted to catch a flick, as we'd previously planned. We went to 'The Art of War' a surprisingly good action flick. Very full movie, no boring bits, and quite entertaining. We went to the 50's diner for supper, I ate like a horse, drank about 3 or 4 liters of pop with my conch fritters. Yes the 50's diner serves fountain drinks and conch fritters. is good. that was my opener for grilled cheese, and the pickle and even the slaw (which I rarely enjoy anywhere) was quite tasty.

Now settling down with a tape of the Jackie Chan Cartoon, (hopefully the schedule kept on target) I'm not expecting to enjoy it, but I'm going to give it 3 chances anyhow, as old Jackie is just a neato dude.

Tomorrow is the everway game, hopefully finishing up plot thread of field agent researching the source of a new trade commodity.... It's getting a little old, and hard to develop the character for me. Trying hard not to be a sarcastic wise-ass guy, as the character is a driven, hard ass type. I broke character a few times last one there.
scottobear: (Default)
Ahhh.. back at work, and the day is off to a decent start. :) got my 5 mile walk in this morning, and it felt good to get home and showered before work. Current plans for the weekend involve surfing with Dave, Cathi and my Little Brother, if the swells are good Saturday AM. Didn't get much sleep, but had a decent evening, tonight after work I'm planning on going with Suzy's boyfriend Bernie to visit her, bring some magazines if she can have 'em, and try and keep her calm. I've not been to a prison visit in a long time (about a year) so I forget if certain things are contraband or not. Suzy's in a real bind, but hopefully that now we've gotten her a real lawyer instead of a public defender, the wheels will speed up a bit. *fingers crossed*

off on a tangent. I'm currently on a Walt Whitman kick, as my earlier post may have shown. I think of that time period, and probably of the vast majority of american writers, he and Twain are very high up there on my list of faves, and I find them to be rather similar in mood and style. For a english lit guy, I have a huge love of american lit. From Ben Franklin to contempo stuff like Updike I think we've really got some great authors. in fact, I'm updating my interests right now. be back after that, and I get my morning java.

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scott von berg

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