bedtime memory...
May. 17th, 2001 11:42 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
scottobearA number of years ago, (when I was about fourteen,I think) I went to visit a friend, but got slightly lost along the way - I'd never been to their house before, and they lived a far way from the bus stop. So I'm wandering, and I grab a sandwich and Coke from a service station.
As I wander, I find myself walking through a gated community - one without gates on the main street, but gates on the houses and side streets. I'm trying to find a bin for my trash, but there isn't one. Anywhere. Because, I realized, such things are only for people who don't live in the compound. And if you don't live there, YOU AREN'T WELCOME.
And there's no-one visible, and there are these little plastic turrets on each corner, and I'm still lost, and, and...
I almost had a panic attack, and this utter conviction that at any moment, a black van would pull up beside me, and men in faceless black helmets would pull me inside and I'd never be seen again.
Found my friend's place 10 minutes later, a few blocks past the compound.
It was one of the most frightening moments of my life. I felt as if I was an invader, a stranger, and that nobody would want to help me.
end memory
I have no idea what brought that to mind. I do know that I still really don't enjoy gated communities.
As I wander, I find myself walking through a gated community - one without gates on the main street, but gates on the houses and side streets. I'm trying to find a bin for my trash, but there isn't one. Anywhere. Because, I realized, such things are only for people who don't live in the compound. And if you don't live there, YOU AREN'T WELCOME.
And there's no-one visible, and there are these little plastic turrets on each corner, and I'm still lost, and, and...
I almost had a panic attack, and this utter conviction that at any moment, a black van would pull up beside me, and men in faceless black helmets would pull me inside and I'd never be seen again.
Found my friend's place 10 minutes later, a few blocks past the compound.
It was one of the most frightening moments of my life. I felt as if I was an invader, a stranger, and that nobody would want to help me.
end memory
I have no idea what brought that to mind. I do know that I still really don't enjoy gated communities.
