6666 There is no disputin', there is no refutin' we're all indebted to Sir Isaac Newton...

[scottobear]

Went to see my brother last night, in a last ditch effort to support him emotionally and straighten his ass out. Things got pretty ugly, and stuff happened that I find to be beyond unbelievable. The bottom line is that while I may love him, I sure as hell don't like him very much. It's times like this that I'd like to swear off my family name and start a fresh one because I'm sick to death of who I'm related to. The Bro basically has done things worse to me than my mother ever did... If I was where I was at mentally even a couple of years back, I'd have disowned him without a second thought.

As it stands, I had a second thought, and he's still my brother. He's a stupid, creepy, vile fuck of a brother as far as my mind is right now, but he's my brother nonetheless. Half of my support is out of love for him, and the other half is keeping him where I can see him, lest I turn my back on a viper and be struck out of foolishness.

He knows where he stands with me.

That is the land of lost content
I see it shining plain
The happy highways where I went
And cannot come again.
-A. E. Houseman
-from "A Stropshire Lad"

I don't know if he can ever regain my trust. We'll see. Something amazing would have to happen. I've already forgiven him for being who he is and what he's done, but that doesn't mean I've forgotten.

I never thought the person that would raise so much bile in my throat would be my brother. Today I've gone from disappointed, to furious, to frightened, to enraged, to shaken. Right now, I'm very sad with a side of thoroughly disgusted. I had half a mind to call in sick today.

Enough of that, for now, though. Let's do some stupid links, dear journal.

---

A man is accused of applying Vaseline petroleum jelly to every surface in his room at a Motel Six near Binghamton, New York.
After Roger Chamberlain checked out last week, the cleaning crew discovered mattresses and bedding were slathered with the slippery stuff. Vaseline covered the TV set, furniture, carpeting and towels -- and everything else in the room.

Police found 14 empty Vaseline containers and numerous pornographic magazines in the room's trash can.

Damage to the motel room and its contents was estimated at over $1,000.

A sheriff's deputy found the Virginia man a short time later at another motel. The deputy said the man was "smeared from head to foot with Vaseline..."

---

I get all sorts of hits due to my last name being similar to the recent beheading victim overseas. Just since midnight (it's 7am now) I've had over 103 hits due to that alone. I still get more hits on the keyword "melons" than any other.

---

Singing Science Records - full MP3s for five classic science-themed folk albums

You can bet I leeched the whole page before it hits the bricks.

---

When did I get moved? scottobear is on Madcow, subcluster 3. Where are you? (last I saw, I was on Santa Sc3.. and before that, I was on Chef sc7. Are they calling me fat?)

---

You're a Speak & Spell!! You nerd, you. Just
because you were disguised as a toy doesn't
mean you weren't educational, you sneaky
bastard.


What childhood toy from the 80s are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

---

A year ago - Skull dream, Scooby-doo fun & book henge in There, Ghetto Fries?

two years ago - Pam got bell's Palsy that lasted for a bit. Ann and Bob have a disagreement. Beans. Gummi Bears vs. Fingerprint Sensors, Charlie's LJ mentioned.

three years ago - connubial, cadaverine, flamingos pink because they eat shrimp, tension thinking

four years ago - Journal will be born in 1 day.

Comments

[tarpo.livejournal.com]

I'm on Porkchop.. which leads me to believe I may actually be a sort of gravy..

I'm sorry about your bro.. I have no idea how I would react in your situation but I do know that your big heart makes it all the harder to deal with.. Maybe he just needs to hit bottom.. wherever that may be.. before he can shake the shit out of his eyes and stop screwing his life up

[scottobear.livejournal.com]

I honestly don't know how he could get any lower than he is now. I think that he's a lost cause.

Thanks for the sympathy.

[danigolden.livejournal.com]

I'm on Porkchop as well. Used to be on Chef. Go ex-Cheffies!

Also, *sigh* I'm really sorry about your brother. It's a shitty place to be. <3<3

[scottobear.livejournal.com]

Yeah, at least Santa and Chef rock the house... Mad Cow sounds pretty cool, though.

Moo.

Thanks for the good thoughts.

[sunshine-two.livejournal.com]

I'm so sorry you're having to go through all this with your brother Scotto. I've been kinda been there, done that with my own brother (while the situation is totally different). I finally had to stop being in contact with him for my own state of mind. Sometimes, it just becomes a totally unhealthy situation to be in you know?

[scottobear.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry you've had to put up with anything remotely like this. I don' t know if cutting him of completely is the best thing for him, in my case. I may reach that decision in the future, but right now, I don't know.

[shoo.livejournal.com]

*hugs*

tough love...=((

There is no point in trying to save someone who clearly does not want it for himself...

Hang in there bud.

[scottobear.livejournal.com]

Thanks.

[happykitty69.livejournal.com]

Isn't it amazing? Family! Sometimes they are a hardship and a personal challenge. Good for you for not giving up and for still trying! Not easy, I know.

Heck, I've considered giving up on a family member too (such a nice fantasy), but, it never works in my case. My heart never fully closes to them. I just can't seem to thwart efforts, even be they manipulative and false.

Anyway, my point it this . . . you're not alone. We are growing beings with a lot of love and life ahead of us. And ultimately crazy-ass buggy family memebers can't touch us. My mantra for these situations is, "Can't touch this." Try it some time, it may work for you too.

[scottobear.livejournal.com]

thanks! I'm just taking things as they come, and preparing as best I can for anything I can.

[hisbeauty.livejournal.com]

Vaseline!? *shakes head & giggles*

[scottobear.livejournal.com]

we'll just call him "slick".

[hisbeauty.livejournal.com]

Oh that wasnt the first thing that popped into my head! lol

Another Science Song

[wickenden.livejournal.com]

have you heard of the McGarrigles?
http://www.mcgarrigles.com/
they have a cool song about salt... lyrics posted below.

I'm sorry about all this shit with your brother. Why some people that we love are so bent on fucking up everything is a mystery to me.

I hope he learns before it is too late, and I hope you can have some relief.


NaCl (SODIUM CHLORIDE)
Kate McGarrigle, Garden Court Music ASCAP
Just a little atom of chlorine
Valence minus one
Swimming thru the sea, digging the scene
Just having fun
She's not worried about the shape or size
Of her outside shell
It's fun to ionize
Just a little atom of Cl
With an unfilled shell

But somewhere in that sea lurks
Handsome Sodium
With enough electrons on his outside shell
Plus that extra one
Somewhere in this deep blue sea
There's a negative
For my extra energy yes
Somewhere in this foam
My positive will find a home

Then unsuspecting Chlorine
Felt a magnetic pull
She looked down and her outside
Shell was full
Sodium cried "what a gas be my bride and
I'll change your name from Chlorine to Chloride"

Now the sea evaporates to make the clouds
For the rain and snow
Leaving her chemical compounds in the abscence
Of H2O
But the crystals that wash upon the shore
Are happy ones
So if you never thought before
Think of the love that you eat
When you salt your meat
Think of the love that you eat
When you salt your meat

Re: Another Science Song

[scottobear.livejournal.com]

I'd never heard of them, but I will certainly check 'em out in the near future. Thanks!

[calamity.livejournal.com]

Sorry about your brother, I know how it is to deal with family members who have addictions. My father was an alcoholic (he's dead now) my aunt has been a prescription drug addict for years. She's been in rehab 3 times without success. The screaming, the begging, pleading, threatening, ignoring, nothing has worked. Atleast we feel like we've done everything we can where she is concerned.
---
How are you able to know if your site comes up on certain hits? Do you have a kick ass counter?
---
What is the deal with the bellspalsy outbreak? In the past 5 years, my boyfriends mother, my mother, my mother's friend and my aunt have gotten it, MORE THAN ONCE. I think it's a freaky condition that isn't being taken seriously.
Vaseline? Heh. I like that in a very kinky way. Interesting prank.
---

[scottobear.livejournal.com]

I don't know.... I seem to be hearing and seeing bellspalsy a *lot* in recent years, too.

I have a couple of counters... I actually embed a keyword tracker in all of my posts (unless I forget to cut and paste it.) if you run perl on your server, I'm happy to share the code with you... if not, I imagine most of the commercially available counters will still give keyword lists.

[juliabee.livejournal.com]

"disappointed, to furious, to frightened, to enraged, to shaken"

The frightened part is a bit alarming to me. Do you know which drugs he takes as a norm? You don't have to tell me, but my worry is that while he is on certain drugs he may become so out of it that he would harm you, or your mom.

I just read that Andy came over to your moms? Is he allowed to go back over there?

[scottobear.livejournal.com]

His normal preferences are Oxycontin, Heroin, and Xanax/alcohol cocktails.

He could quite easily go out of control, but I was more frightened about his associates knowing where my mother lives and how to bypass security.

Andy is absolutely *not* allowed anywhere near there. He's who I'm worried about. the guy has a rap sheet as long as your arm, and it's populated with armed robbery and assault.